Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader thought he would share some thoughts he had while dining today at a Chinese buffet here in Fredericksburg. Thoughts are in no particular order.

1) Is there some ambience to be gained by requiring the pseudo-servers to wear silken (rayon?) blouses reminiscent of a “chinese” style?

2) Your Maximum Leader likes it a lot when the buffet has three separate sections. One for “entrees.” One for “appetizers.” And one for fruits and desserts.

3) Who’da thunk that they would have pretty good sweet tea at a Chinese buffet?

4) Your Maximum Leader loves shrimp toast. Damn. Shrimp toast fresh out of the fryer is good stuff. He’s probably eaten two whole slices (not just portions of slices - but full-sized slices of bread with the shrimp mixture on top.) He’s probably going to regret enjoying that so much.

5) Even considering the place is a buffet at lunch… There are lots and lots of very heavy people eating here. And your Maximum Leader doesn’t mean just a little obese. He’s talking one fortune cookie away from disaster (or a wafer thin mint if one prefers).

6) Doesn’t Kung-Pao chicken have peanuts? He’s searched and searched, but there don’t appear to be peanuts in the Kung-Pao chicken. Bits of zucchini it has, but no peanuts. Odd. It will be avoided.

7) Ah… General Tso… You were a murdering bastard, but you do make a tasty chicken…

8 ) Your Maximum Leader hates fortune cookies that contain pithy sayings, but not fortunes. Actually, he will make an exception for pithy sayings by an actual chinese philosopher. But damnit, he wants fortune cookies with fortunes in them. Such as the one he got today. It read: “You will be traveling and coming into a fortune.” Now your Maximum Leader can hope that he wins the lottery or something this weekend as he travels to his mother-in-law’s house for Mother’s Day.

9) Your Maximum Leader likes it when they bring a sliced orange with your fortune cookies. Indeed, he actually likes the orange more than the cookie.

Carry on.