Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader went to sleep last night feeling low. His beloved Washington Capitals had just lost in OT to the Tampa Bay Lightning and gone down 2 games to none in the hockey playoffs.
Little did he know that the news this morning would be more upbeat.
According to every news source in the whole world, Osama Bin Laden is dead at the hands of a US special forces team.
Well this is good news. Your Maximum Leader doffs his bejewelled mylan cap to a number of people responsible for this event. First off, thanks to the warriors who actually carried out the mission. From the shooters to the techs who got the equipment ready to those on land and sea who monitored the progress of the mission. Well done to you all. Secondly, your Maximum Leader thanks all the intelligence operatives who got us the information we used to act as we did. Thirdly, thanks to all our servicemen all around the globe who protect the US and our allies.
And of course, you have to thank President Obama and his national security team. Well done to you all. It seems as though the President doesn’t equivocate or prevaricate when it comes to killing someone who needs killing.** Your Maximum Leader is grateful for that.
Your Maximum Leader is sure that more details and reports will come out over today and the next few days that will better inform us as to what exactly happened and how. He looks forward to reading them.
Your Maximum Leader is glad that we didn’t try to take him alive. He isn’t sure how we would have dealt with him given Atty General Holder’s proclivities for putting terrorists on trial in New York City. It is better that we went for the kill.
Your Maximum Leader wonders if any of the special forces troops rubbed a little bacon grease on their shells before going on this mission… We’ll never know… Officially anyway…
Your Maximum Leader has been reading and hearing that it was a Navy SEAL team that executed this mission. But officials seem to only want to say it was US special forces… Your Maximum Leader doesn’t care one way or the other. He is pleased that no servicemen (of any branch) were lost while on this mission.
Your Maximum Leader is glad that one less evil man lives and breathes on this earth today.
Carry on.
** UPDATE FROM YOUR MAXIMUM LEADER: Apparently one reader wasn’t sure what your Maximum Leader meant by this. He was referring to the killing of the Somali pirates a year or so ago. The President approved use of deadly force without much hesitation in that incident too.