Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader needs to ask you all to ponder some eternal questions… Here they are…

Who trims the all fat off a corned beef? Really. Who? It isn’t the best part - but it is a damned good part. (Well… Mrs Villain does. She also cuts the corned beef with the grain - which makes no sense. This is why your Maximum Leader tries to keep all meat carving duties to himself.)

Would a hand-job from Kali be really great, or too much?

If your “tween” children start doing chores around the house (like laundry and dusting) without being asked, cajoled or prodded should you just give thanks or start being suspicious about what they might want in return?

What the hell do all these people who protest every time there is a big international summit actually DO when there isn’t a summit going on? If they are anti-capitalists and anti-bank and anti-fossil fuel and pretty much anti-civilization why don’t they just live in a hut in the woods way off the grid and stay there? Did they drive to the protest in their own car? Idiots.

Speaking of corned beef… Why don’t people eat more corned beef? Your Maximum Leader normally has one around St Patricks Day. But then after St Patricks Day he checks out all the grocery stores around until he finds the one really selling them for cheap. Then he buys 4 or 5 to have throughout the spring. It takes stores a while to sell out of corned beef. He doesn’t understand that.

What possesses a person to get a tramp stamp? You can’t see it yourself? Out of sight out of mind? Is it there to provide someone with a little extra visual stimulation while they are sodomizing you? Your Maximum Leader also doesn’t understand those “angel wing tattoos” on shoulder blades. Frankly, he doesn’t understand tattoos.

There you are. Discuss among yourselves.

Carry on.