Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maixmum Leader was roused from his self-imposed break by the news this morning. Yes… Former Vice President of the United States Al Gore has won the Nobel Peace prize.

Now your Maximum Leader’s dear mother did bring him up in accordance to the old maxim, “If you don’t have anything nice to say… Sit next to me.” (God bless dear ole Alice Roosevelt Longworth.); so in that spirit…

Your Maximum Leader will first extend his honest congratulations to Vice President Gore. Winning the Nobel Peace Prize is indeed an honor. So Mr Gore gets a doff of the bejeweled floppy cap from his (and your) Maximum Leader. It isn’t often that a man wins an Oscar and a Nobel Peace Prize in the same year. So, kudos to you Mr Gore. Your Maximum Leader hopes that Tipper give you some extra good lovin’ tonight to celebrate. (Perhaps she’ll need to buy some carbon offsets to counter the furious lovemaking that she’ll be givin’ you.)

Now comes the not-so-nice part, and this is not honestly directed at Vice President Gore… Your Maximum Leader doesn’t know what exactly the Nobel Peace Prize stands for anymore. There are plenty of people who believe that this prize lost most (if not all) its credibility when Yasser Arafat won it. (There are others who would place the Peace Prize’s “jumping the shark” moment earlier when Henry Kissinger won it. Frankly, your Maximum Leader likes to point to the award in 1929 as the moment of the Peace Prize’s downfall. Frank B. Kellogg - Ha!)

Your Maximum Leader is all for a prize recognizing the work of an individual (or even a group) to promote peace in the world. But recently he’s been baffled by the Nobel Committee’s choices. Apparently all you have to do to promote peace in the world is be for sustainable development. For the longest time your Maximum Leader thought that to win the award you actually had to do something to promote peace. You know, like end a war, or negotiate to avoid one. But hell, what does your Maximum Leader know? We will not need a Peace Prize in the Mike World Order - as all will be contented under the semi-benevolent autocratic rule of your Maximum Leader…

Anyhoo… Congrats Mr Gore.

Carry on.