WWYMLD? John F. Kerry edition

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader, in the spirit of bipartisanship, figured that he would turn his keen mind on the situation John Kerry faces.

First off Senator Kerry, don’t panic. It looks like you are panicing. Don’t lose your cool. Yes, Bush seems to be leading you in many (read: nearly all) national polls (and even a few - read: quite many - polls in the battlefield states).

A number of bloggers (you can call them amateur pundits if you like) are saying the election is over. BRD has declared the Tipping Point tipped. Skippy has said as much too.

But none of these preditions matter. They don’t matter because really the electorate is still pretty polarized and isn’t sure about either of you.

A little while ago your Maximum Leader suggested you give James Carville a call. In that earlier post your Maximum Leader wrote:

But will Kerry fire his Massachusetts buddies and hire a ragin’ cajun to run his campaign over the last 60 some odd days until the election?

No.

And have you hired James Carville yet Senator? No. He is an “unpaid advisor” to the campaign. “Unpaid advisor” is not the same as “running your campaign.”

And did your Maximum Leader mention anything about Paul Begala? Or Joe Lockhart? Or Mike McCurry? Or Bob Schrum?

That would be: no, no, no, and no.

And is Mary Beth Cahill still working for you? Uh… Yup.

And who exactly is in charge of your campaign?

No! Lemme guess… Teresa? Uh, Lockhart? No! That Sasso guy? Uh, you?.

Humm… Do you see a pattern here enator?

Let your Maximum Leader use a cliché, too many chefs spoil the soup. (Look, it isn’t only your Maximum Leader who thinks so.)

You can’t project a message and a constant image when you have a whole bunch of schmucks telling you how to do things. Senator Kerry, you need to grow a set of balls (or just take the ones Teresa has for the next two months) and start firing people. As your Maximum Leader sees it, Cahill, Lockart, McCurry, Schrum, and the unpaid Begala have to go. Keep Carville and ditch the others. Carville knows how to win, and he knows how to keep people who don’t know how to stay on message, on message.

Have you ever really listened to Bill Clinton speak when he gets on a policy-wonkish roll? Get an intern to give you some videos of Clinton at some of those White House summits he had during his first year in office and watch them. Then think to yourself, James Carville kept this man on message for two years while he ran for president. (If your interns seem to be in short supply, give Bill a call. Tell him you have about two hours free and you want him to tell you how to fix healthcare and let him roll. You’ll get a first-hand taste of that to which your Maximum Leader refers.)

Anyhow… You really really really need to take control of your campaign and give the reins to Carville. You are too busy to do all the things that need to get done. That is why you have a campaign manager.

Speaking of things you need to do…

Hows about finding a message and sticking to it. Calling Bush the “excuse president” is a good start. Your Maximum Leader liked it. He liked it a lot. Catchy. Plus it gives that subtle cut to Bush’s line about being decisive. Sure Bush is all decisive, but when his decisions are bad he makes up excuses. Brilliant! (Tell your Maximum Leader, did Carville feed you that one? Your Maximum Leader thinks he did.)

The “excuse” line is a good one to pull out in debates too. When Bob Scheffer asks Bush to explain the weak economy, when you get your rebuttal just say “Excuses, excuses George. When are you going to take responsibility and own up to what you haven’t done?” Bush will hate that.

And while we are talking about debates. Push for three, settle for two, and demand that one be in late October. You are a skilled debater - if you stay on message. You can take Bush if you don’t let him get under your skin and don’t let him corner you in your record.

About your record. You need to develop a short, simple answer to all of the flip-flop stuff the Bush people are throwing your way. How about a pat response of “Bills in the Senate are often riddled with amendments. Many times I had to vote against measures which I originally supported because they contained too many riders that I couldn’t in good faith support.”

Your Maximum Leader suggests that after the short answer you try this out for size, “If the President had taken any time to understand the legislative process, or taken the initiative with his own party to fashion a legislative agenda; he might know a little more about how things work in Washington.”

That would make Bush supporters cry, “Ouch.”

Anyhoo…

You’ve got 43 days until the election. This thing is far from over. You just need to pick a theme and hammer it home.

And not make an ass of yourself.

Carry on.

PS: In case you missed it. Here is the WWYMLD George W. Bush edition.

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