I mowed my lawn this weekend. We have a big yard, and my mower is a mulching mower so I rake high traffic areas afterwards. So there I am raking up mounds of grass, enjoying a glorious suburban Saturday Morning. The wife has our daughter at dance class, I’m thinking of what Mammal flesh I’m going to sear over hot flames for dinner. Wonderful.

Then I see a funny brown spider in the pile of grass I’m raking. It’s not moving, and It looks kind of menacing. It rings a bell in my mind, and I get an idea. So I run inside and get a small piece of tupperware, go back outsideand easily catch the spider. Then I go inside, get on google, and try to ID this puppy. Sure enough, I found myself a brown recluse.

So now that I have a dangerous poisonous arachnid in my posession, what do I do? Do I flush it down the toilet? Feed it to my cat? Nope. I’m already in 100% “Just not thinking” mode, so I take that puppy outside and release it into the wild again. At least not in our yard.