Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader is impressed. Stephen Strasburg was really THAT good last night.

Your Maximum Leader watched one of Strasburg’s starts at AAA and felt he was really ready for the big show. But there was still a nagging thought in his mind that once Strasburg started facing all big league batters you might see a crack in his game.

Well… So far no cracks in Strasburg’s game.

Your Maximum Leader wasn’t too far off in his predictions. Nats did win. Strasburg got the win. And Strasburg’s ERA was 2.57 and not 3.1X. Your Maximum Leader didn’t believe that Strasburg was going to pitch a perfect game (or a no hitter even) in his first outing.

Strasburg struck out 14. He didn’t walk anyone (that was a feat that deserves a little more praise). His movement to the plate is short and quick. A little statistic people aren’t mentioning but should. That game last night was 2 hours and 20 minutes long. If it hadn’t been for commericals your Maximum Leader bets it would have been under 2 hours. It was a great start to what your Maximum Leader hopes will be a long and distinguished career (most of it in Washington).

All in all Nationals fans have a lot to be excited about. If Strasburg can pitch like this every fifth night, and if Drew Storen is able to move into that starting rotation soon; then the Nats will have two dominating pitchers and a good chance to pull out wins in 2/5th of their games.

If your Maximum Leader has been tenative up to now he isn’t anymore. That Strasburg kid can really pitch good. (NB: Your Maximum Leader isn’t ready to annoint him the second coming of Walter Johnson yet, but he understands the comparisons better now.)

Go Nats!

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader imagines that you’ve heard the baseball news out of Washington by now. (That is unless you willfully don’t listen to sports news or you live under a rock.) Pitchining phenom Stephen Strasburg is set to debut tonight against the Pittsburgh Pirates at Nationals Park.

Yes, your Maximum Leader has high hopes for Strasburg. He believes that with a little time and maturity he’ll be a great pitcher. He’s not sure that Strasburg is the second coming of Walter Johnson or anything; but he should be really good.

That is he should be really good in another year or so…

Your Maximum Leader isn’t imagining a near-perfect outing for Strasburg tonight. He imagines that the jitters, anxiety and high expectations of a city wanting a winner will have an effect on the young man in his first MLB start.

Prediction?

Nats beat Pirates. Strasburg earns first win but ends with 3.1X ERA.

Go Nats!

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader remembers when he first thought about getting a web site. It was probably 1997 or so. He wasn’t sure what he’d do with a web site, but it seemed like the thing to have. He didn’t get off his lazy duff and register a cool name while the registering was good. Back in 1999 he remembers reading an article on CNet or something that stated that almost every single word in the Webster’s American Dictionary had been registered as a .com domain. The article provided a short list of some of the available single words still out there. One leapt to your Maximum Leader’s eye: perfidy. Your Maximum Leader read that word and immediately set off to Register.com and tried to register perfidy.com. Sadly, it was taken by the time he got there. But he saw that perfidy.net and perfidy.org were still available. Your Maximum Leader decided that the “gold standard” of domains were the .com domains and he passed on those two.

Then he went and got nakedvillainy.com which is cool and all, but he’d not thought through some of the porn-y implications of the domain. (NB to porn people: if you would like to buy this domain - reasonable offers will be accepted.)

So… Imagine your Maximum Leader’s glee when he discovered that perfidy.org was a cool blog. Guess what else? The writers over at the Ministry of Minor Perfidy are pretty cool. He’s met a number of them. They are good guys.

Well… Buckethead over at the Ministry of Minor Perfidy informed your Maximum Leader that he’d (Buckethead that is) written some “crazy shit” over on the blog. So your Maximum Leader had to check it out. Your Maximum Leader figured out that neither this post nor this post were the “crazy shit” he’d been expecting.

It must be this post that is the crazy shit post.

Now… Your Maximum Leader hasn’t poured through the archives of Unqualified Reservations as has Buckethead; but what he’s read is very thought provoking. Of course, your Maximum Leader styles himself a pseudo-benevolent autocrat; so let’s say he might have some anti-democratic tendencies. There are definately times when all this democracy stuff isn’t what its cracked up to be. As Thomas Friedman noted recently on Meet the Press, there are times you wish the US were run like Communist China so that authority could just dictate something that was in the greater interest of the nation and be done with it. Your Maximum Leader would never throw a statement like that out. Of course your Maximum Leader isn’t interested in a Communist Autocracy either. He is more for the Roman Principate model himself.

Anyhoo… Check out Buckethead’s post and then go on over to Unqualified Reservations and see what you think.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader has been following the whole gulf oil leak with growing feelings of dread and gloom. He was hopeful that the first capping device was going to work. Then it froze up and got clogged. Since then it has been one failure after another.

Are you ready for a prediction?

This gusher will be still be gushing on Election Day.

Yes. Election Day.

Your Maximum Leader has no confidence that anything is going to stop this in the near term. He also doubts that the “relief wells” that “should” be active in August will do the trick.

This is the worst ecological disaster since Chernobyl. And in some respects it might turn out being worse.

Just wait until hurricane season gets fully underway. Your Maximum Leader foresees oil everywhere along the gulf coast from Guatemala to the Florida Keys. At this stage he would not be surprised to find oil from this gusher wind up on the Outer Banks of North Carolina.

Your Maximum Leader will wait to get a full and final report on what happened before he starts placing blame on any entity. It seems as though BP will come out holding the short straw in all this. But you can’t tell that right now with certainty. If BP is culpable, then we can all hope that they remain very profitable. Because if they go tits-up due to this the US taxpayer will be stuck with a clean-up bill. (Okay… Let’s be honest… The US taxpayer is going to be stuck with a big bill on this anyway. Lucky for us health care reform will save us so much money!)

Your Maximum Leader hopes you’ve seen the white-sand beaches of the Florida panhandle, because they aren’t going to be white for much longer.

Carry on.

UPDATE: Your Maximum Leader was recently reminded that Chernobyl is still worse in so many ways. Not the least of which is that the containment dome is collapsing and another will have to be built. This cycle will continue for centuries.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader has been following the fall-out from the Israeli raid on the “humanitarian aid” ship from Turkey. Sure the Israeli’s, in this instance, might have been a little heavy-handed. But really, how much of a “blockade” are they really running here? Bascially the Israelis stop every ship and vehicle going into the Gaza Strip to search for weapons. The real “humanitarian” aid isn’t being stopped and turned back. (At best it is detained.)

Your Maximum Leader has, for just about as long as he can remember, be very pro-Israel. He’s not saying that Israel is always right and everyone else is wrong. That isn’t the case. But he will generally side with Israel all the time because they are the one beacon of civilization (as your Maximum Leader understands it) in the region.

Sadly though, Israel, like the West in general, is doomed.

How does one put it delicately? The Israelis are going to be fucked out of existance. Quite literally. They aren’t having enough babies. Demographically they are screwed. Before too long the (Westernized Jewish) Israelis are going to be a minority in their own country; out populated by (not Westernized and Arab) Israelis. Once that happens all bets are off.

(NB: If Bar Refaeli wanted to do something to help her country - which she probably doesn’t by the way - she’d get knocked up and start having all sorts of really really good-looking babies.)

Frankly… It isn’t much better in Europe. Europe will be the next to fall (after Israel). The day will come when non-westernized immigrants (mostly muslims) will be the ones running France and Germany. Of course, Western ideas of social/moral/political relativism will hasten the end.

Then it will be the USA, Canada and Australia as the last bastions of Western Civilization…

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader is upset by the blown call in last night’s Cleveland Indians v Detroit Tigers baseball game. He’s sure you’ve seen the blown call by now. Your Maximum Leader was watching the Nats v Astros game when he got the call from his brother-in-law about what had happened. Your Maximum Leader went and switched to MLB network and saw what was going on from that point.

Your Maximum Leader really does feel awful for Armando Galarraga. Everyone knows it was a bad call. Them are the breaks sometimes.

Of course what this will lead to will doom the game of baseball forever…

First off Bud Selig (baseball’s big stupid idiot commissioner) will likely “feel bad” about the whole thing and will order the game recorded as a “Perfect Game” in the record books with an asterisk or something.

Then they will start on the replays… There will be instant replay in baseball in the next few years. It started with the replays for home run calls. Next season they will have challenges and a “booth official” to review base-running calls. Then you will have computers that sense balls and strikes on every pitch…

The up-side of all of this will be that there will never be a blown call again… The downside… Games will only last about 5 hours…

Your Maximum Leader should admit that he’s grown tolerant of replays for close home run calls. But he is still piping-hot angry about interleague play and all the stupid changes to the All-Star game.

Ugh.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader is sad. Very very sad.

You’ll recall that a few weeks ago he went to Kentucky and visited a number of Bourbon distilleries. During those visits he tasted the “distillers beer” in the vats that was fermenting and aging and getting ready to be turned into moonshine…

It tasted like bad beer. It smelled like bad beer.

Well… For the first time since he’s returned from Kentucky, your Maximum Leader decided to have a beer last night.

Guess what? (NB: Chickenbutt!)

When your Maximum Leader brought the beer to his lips to drink and smelled the hoppy brew… All he could think about (and taste) was the distillers beer he’d sampled.

Your Maximum Leader couldn’t finish the beer. It was gross smelling. He had to switch to Bourbon…

Your Maximum Leader wonders if he’ll ever drink beer again…

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader wrote earlier of his acquisition of a new grill. One that is both a gas grill and a charcoal grill…

Remember how he said he’d likely never use the gas side…

Well… Your Maximum Leader is a liar.

Last night Mrs. Villain informed your Maximum Leader that she wanted “grilled chicken” for dinner. And she wanted it in about 30 minutes. So it was out to the gas grill…

The chicken turned out just fine actually… Your Maximum Leader missed the smoke that you get from charcoal…

Your Maximum Leader imagines that this will be a recurring theme in his life. He’ll have to draw the line somewhere… It it goes unchecked next thing you know Mrs Villain will want him to cook ribs on the gas side…

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader’s ongoing fascination with the zombie apocalypse continues. This time with this cool graphic from College Life.

Source: Online Classes

So for us East Coasters it looks like a long ride through zombie infested land to the west. Or duke it out with the undead in the Appalachians.

Your Maximum Leader is bringing his firepower to the Smallholder’s farm in case of a zombie apocalypse… Don’t ya’ll get any ideas about tagging along neither…

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader fancies himself pretty handy on the grill. His grill of choice for about 15 years now has been a Professional Char-Griller grill/smoker. (Here is the newest model of the one your Maximum Leader has used for the past 15 years and will highly recommend to you.)

Well, your Maximum Leader’s grill/smoker has served him very well over one and a half decades. But recently its fallen on some hard times. Sadly it has been left out a few times without a cover to suffer the elements. The ash catcher has completed fallen apart. Two of the cooking grates have been broken. (Your Maximum Leader will not say whom exactly broke them while attempting to “clean” them - but know that he’s looking at Mrs Villain right now…) And finally, the original paint has peeled off in a number of spots and the metal is rusting badly. (NB: your Maximum Leader has carefully sanded and repainted the spots with a high temperature resistant special grill paint, but the spots continue to peel and rust.)

Your Maximum Leader suggested to Mrs Villain that it might be time to buy a new grill/smoker. He figures he’d gotten his $99 worth out of the first one. Mrs Villain suggested that your Maximum Leader purchase a gas grill for the Villainschloss.

Well… This was something of a sore spot for your Maximum Leader. You see, he is an inveterate user of charcoal. He isn’t a gas grill type of guy. Grilling is something done over naturally created fire. And by definition when you smoke food (which your Maximum Leader does freqently) it must be using fire which produces heat and smoke.

Charcoal grilling isn’t for Mrs Villain. She doesn’t like the work involved. It annoys her that it takes 25-30 minutes to get coals ready to cook. It annoys her that heating is uneven. It annoys her that you have to watch for flame-ups. Basically, she loves the results, but can’t stand the process. This is to say she can’t stand the process if she has to do it herself. Most of the time, of course, she doesn’t even attempt to use the grill/smoker. It is the domain of your Maximum Leader.

That said, since Mrs Villain is home all summer (being a teacher and all) she likes to cook more over the summer. She would also like to grill more over the summer. But she doesn’t want to be a slave to your Maximum Leader’s schedule when it comes to eating dinner. So she wants a gas grill. One she feels she can control and use better and more often than a charcoal grill.

Well… Your Maximum Leader cannot ever forsee himself using a gas grill. It just isn’t him. But he loves his wife tremendously and wants her to be happy. He also doesn’t feel like coming home and grilling late into the evening during the summer. He also thinks it would be good for Mrs Villain to grill some on her own.

What to do? What to do?

Compromise of course.

The answer… A Professional Char-Griller Duo Model #5050 dual gas grill/smoker. Yes loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader got, what he hopes, is the best of both worlds. A gas grill (with side burner) for her; and a real charcoal grill/smoker for him. (Honestly, he might use both sides from time to time - and he can imagine that the side burner is really handy.)

You will get, from time to time, some updates on how the #5050 is working out. It will get used for the first time this coming weekend. Your Maximum Leader might need to smoke some bacon up since he is running low… He also plans on having some steaks on Saturday…

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader remembers and prays for the souls of all who have died in the service of our glorious Republic.

He also keeps in his heart and prayers those who serve today. Especially his cousins who serve in Iraq, the Pentagon, and Europe (soon to be back in Afghanistan).

A view of the Masonic Cemetary of Fredericksburg, VA, looking towards some of the graves of Revolutionary War Veterans. (Over the brick wall in the distance is James Monroe’s law office. Monroe was a resident of my fair city, as well as a Colonel during the Revolution, and President of the US of course.)

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader has been drinking quite a bit of bourbon over the weekend. He made his first Manhattan cocktail on Saturday. It was fine. He made it with Evan Williams bourbon, sweet vermouth and a dash of bitters. As he said, it was okay but nothing to write home about.

(NB to readers, especially the Air Marshal if he is lurking out there: Your Maximum Leader felt compelled to write the exact brand of bourbon he used in his Manhattan so that the Air Marshal would not wonder about which brand he used. You see, your Maximum Leader brought home a bottle of Wild Turkey Rare Breed from his recent bourbon weekend with the Air Marshal. And the Air Marshal emplored your Maximum Leader not to mix the Rare Breed into a cocktail, or mix it into ginger ale or coke (as he does sometimes). While your Maximum Leader can’t promise that he’ll never mix the Rare Breed into a cocktail or ginger ale or coke, he did want you all to know that he didn’t this time.)

(NB - again: By the way. Your Maximum Leader knows that a “true” Manhattan cocktail is made with Rye Whisky and not Bourbon.)

Your Maximum Leader did notice on the Maker’s Mark website that they mix a shot of bourbon into an Arnold Palmer. It sounded good. So he tried it. Frankly… It is really good. So he’s been drinking them all weekend.

Frankly, your Maximum Leader imagines Arnie Palmer himself (and John Daly for certain) would like their Arnold Palmer’s with a shot of bourbon in them.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader will share another conversation in the style of FLG that was had at the Villainschloss over the long weekend.

[Scene - the dining room. The whole family is seated for dinner.]
Villainette #2 (looking sideways at her brother, the Wee Villain - aged 5, seated next to her): Don’t do that.
Mrs Villain: Don’t do what?
Villainette #2: He’s scratching himself. You know… THERE…
Villainette #1: Ewww… Gross… I’m trying to eat over here.
Mrs Villain (to Wee Villain): Stop it.

A moment later the Wee Villain stands up from his chair and stands next to the table in plain sight.

Max Ldr (to the Wee Villain): Are you okay? You’re holding yourself like you need to use the bathroom. Do you need to go to the bathroom.
Wee Villain: No. I am moving bochuk.
Mrs Villain: What? You’re moving what? Bochuk? What is bochuk?
Wee Villain: Not bochuk. Bob and Chuck.
Mrs Villain: Bob and Chuck? Who are Bob and Chuck.
Wee Villain: Come on mom! They are the names I gave my balls. Bob and Chuck.

Choking on food ensues as does laughter and groans.

Max Ldr: Son, you can’t play with Bob and Chuck at the dinner table.
Wee Villain: But they are really itchy. Please, can I go to my room and do it?
Max Ldr: Of course. But wash your hands before coming back to the table.

The Wee Villain leaves to go to his room and Mrs Villain, Villainette #1 and Villainette #2 are staring at your Maximum Leader.

Max Ldr: I don’t know why you’re staring at me. I’ve never named mine. I don’t know where he got that. Probably from some malcontent in school…

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader will present to you a conversation which occured over the weekend at the Villainschloss. (Grace a FLG for the post style.)

Villainette #1: Daddy, why do your pants always look better when we take them off the drying rack?
Max Ldr: My pants look better than whose pants when the come off the drying rack?
Villainette #1: Well they look better than mine or mommy’s.
Max Ldr: If you look at the drying rack you will see I fold mine differently than you and mommy fold yours.
Villainette #1: So your way of folding is better than mine and mommy’s?
Max Ldr: I wouldn’t go so far as to say my way is better…
Villainette #1: But if your pants look better than ours when they come off the drying rack and the only thing you do differently is folding then wouldn’t your way be better?
Max Ldr: As I said, I wouldn’t go quite so far as to say mine is better. If you want to draw conclusions based on your own emprical observations far be it for me to try and tell you otherwise.
Villainette #1: You’re trying awfully hard not to say that mommy and I do it wrong.
Max Ldr: I’m not ascribing “rightness” or “wrongness” to a methodology of pant folding. You are drawing your own conclusions.
Villainette #1: You normally don’t wait to declare something right or wrong. I don’t understand why you don’t want to say that mommy’s way is wrong. Is something up?
Max Ldr: Yes.
Villainette #1: What?
Max Ldr: Your mother…
Villainette #1: She’s standing behind me isn’t she?
Max Ldr: Yes.
Villainette #1: Ah. I see.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader doesn’t have a subject or theme to this post. So you’ll just have to bear with him.

Last night your Maximum Leader dreamnt that he (and Mrs Villain) were going to a party at the Hearst Castle. We were the guests of George Hamilton. Hamilton was taking us all around and introducing us to everyone. Somehow your Maximum Leader ended up in a huge Gothic library, in a smoking jacket, smoking cigars with George Hamilton, Peter Bogdanovich, Francis Ford Coppola, and Eddie Izzard (who was not wearing a smoking jacket, but instead a sequined evening gown). Conversation revolved around making a film version of Shakespeare’s “Julius Caesar.” The “gimmick” of the film would be having it set in late 20th Century America and Caesar has overthrown the government. (Caesar would be killed on the floor of the old Senate Chamber in the Capitol.)

Your Maximum Leader played with an iPad yesterday for about an hour. We wants one now. We wants one…

Your Maximum Leader thought of Robbo when he learned that Brooks Brothers is running a seersucker suit sale. Go for it Robbo!

Your Maximum Leader doesn’t have too much planned for the weekend. If the weather holds he’ll take the family out for a little hike in the George Washington National Forest. We may see a waterfall if we are lucky.

Carry on.