Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader reads on the news wire, and in the Washington Post, that Mary Cheney is pregnant. Mary Cheney is the daughter of the Vice President and Lynne Cheney. You may also know that Mary Cheney is a lesbian.

Now, your Maximum Leader has already read a few articles all giving some sort of opinion on Ms. Cheney’s prenancy. Frankly, your Maximum Leader was a little disgusted by them all. Disgusted by the fact that not a single author on the subject seems to have any shred of empathy, compassion, or even happiness for either Ms. Cheney, her partner, or the Vice-President.

Your Maximum Leader wishes Ms. Cheney, Ms. Poe, and all their families the best. He hopes it is a pregnancy without incident and that the baby is healthy and happy.

Carry on.