Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader noticed an interesting article on the news wire and decided it needed his commentary. Here is the article: Hangman Is Finally Learning the Ropes.

It appears as though Sri Lanka has had a hangman on their payroll for the past three years, although until last month, the death penalty was illegal. And frankly, the death penalty has been dormant for 30 years.

Think about that for a moment. The government of Sri Lanka has a person on their payroll to do a job that no one had done for 30 years. Your Maximum Leader has to ask, “Does that job come with civil service benefits?” If so, damnit what a fantastic job.

Regardless of that, the government of Sri Lanka is either stupid (for having a hangman with no one to hang) or remarkably filled with foresight (for having a hangman on the ready in case someone needed hanging - and in your Maximum Leader’s experience there is ALWAYS SOMEONE who needs hanging).

Well Mr. Suranimala (not his real name), your Maximum Leader doffs his bejewele floppy hat in your direction and offers you best of luck in your career. And if you need some rope, write, your Maximum Leader has plenty.

Carry on.