Dead Idiot Alert
Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader reads from the news wire that a Parachutist dies jumping from Eiffel Tower.
Deservedly so. Why on earth would you want to jump off the Eiffel Tower? (Unless of course you are MayDay being pursued by James Bond.) Everyone knows that the Eiffel Tower is for proposing to your loved one and/or jumping to your death when you just can’t take it anymore.
Okay… Perhaps the Eiffel Tower has more uses than just those two. But those are the big ones…
Carry on.