Greetings loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader tires of the continuing Janet Jackson boob contraversy. Surely he poked a little fun at the fact that he was shocked (shocked!) at being subjected to looking at a 37-year-old boob with a nipple shield. And long-timereaders may know that your Maximum Leader has some issues with pornography. But really… A little boob isn’t going to hurt anyone. No need for a lawsuit. Hey we should take a more British approach to this.
Allow your Maximum Leader to detail some of his positions on the whole “boob” issue. Your Maximum Leader loves boobs. He likes looking at them. He likes playing with them (okay, only Mrs. Villain’s…) He thinks natural boobs are best. You know them. They are the ones that match the bearer proportionally and don’t have that “enhanced” look. Your Maximum Leader doesn’t mind looking at boobs. He doesn’t mind them covered. Or uncovered. And, in fact, he finds boobs harmless. Overall, he thinks that we should become more tolerant of the boob in everyday life. Admittedly, he has a little problem with boobs when they are included in a situation without some sort of warning. (Like the Super Bowl halftime show. If they had said, “There will be discordant music, poor singing, scantily clad dancers, Kid Rock, and oh - a Boob during this halftime show.” before the halftime show; it would be okay.) A boob here or there is not a big deal. Your Maximum Leader doesn’t think that exposing a boob (or even both boobs!) on network TV is a big deal. We should loosen up a little.
Don’t get the wrong vibe from your Maximum Leader. He is not in favour of porn on network TV. But a boob in and of itself isn’t porn. Porn has its place in a free and open society. But it should be separated from plain ole boobs. In college, your Maximum Leader used to give some definitions: Nude - the artistic state of being without clothing; Naked - the state of being without clothing; and Nekkid - the state of being without clothing involving vigourous action by one or more people. Your Maximum Leader has never found anything wrong with nudes. And he isn’t upset by naked in a public forum either. Nekkid needs a little work. Generally people making porn are nekkid. Porn should be available to people that want it, but easily avoidable by those who don’t. Indeed, he would really like to see an internet “red light” district to segregate porn sites from other sites. Something like an .XXX extension instead of .com, .net, whatever. (It would solve those pesky whitehouse.com vs. whitehouse.gov problems too!) Anyway, we (as a society) should lighten up on boobs.
Of course, any female readers who would like to model their boobs in a Nakedvillainy tee shirt and perhaps become a paid endorser of said clothing should let your Maximum Leader know.
Carry on.
