Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader doesn’t have much time to blog today, although he will be puttering around the Villainschloss for part of the day. He has to attend to family matters today and this weekend. You see, your Maximum Leader’s esteemed sister is engaged to be married tomorrow; and your Maximum Leader is going to have to twist the Pope’s arm to perform the mass…

Anyway… Well… After reading the AirMarshal’s post about the movie “Troy” and how it features Mr. Aniston’s ass, your Maximum Leader thought he would go ahead and write a post about his revelation last night while watching TV.

You see, Mrs. Villain was on the Ubercomputer again and your Maximum Leader was unable to blog. So, he decided to watch some TV. He surfed around until he found AMC TV’s “Epic Thursdays.” Last night’s movie was the Stanley Kubrick Classic, “Spartacus.” Now, your Maximum Leader is a big fan of Laurence Oliver, Kirk Douglas, and Stanley Kubrick. And he has seen Spartacus many times before. But last night he noticed something he never had noticed before and felt pretty silly for having missed it.

Your Maximum Leader trusts you have seen Spartacus. If you have not, go and buy it or rent it or something. It is worth your time. But to get on with it…

There is a scene in which Crassus (Laurence Olivier) is bathing and speaking to his new slave Antoninus (Tony Curtis). And Crassus asks Antoninus if he likes both “oysters” and “snails.” Saying that some men prefer only “oysters” and other (but many fewer) only “snails.” As for Crassus himself, he proclaims to like both.

Now my minions. Your Maximum Leader has watched “Spartacus” at least a dozen times in his life. (And regrettably he suffered through the USA Network Miniseries of the same name recently.) And he has watched that scene every time. Only your Maximum Leader JUST NOW CAUGHT ON TO WHAT CRASSUS REALLY WAS TALKING ABOUT!!!! He must have been concentrating on Glabrus’ secret march out of Rome which is in the same scene…

Anyway. After that scene, your Maximum Leader thought to himself, “Damn, that Laurence Olivier was one studly guy. But he isn’t as studly as Kirk Douglas and that cleft chin of his.”

And after a few more hours of watching sweaty gladiators and legionnairs duke it out all over southern Italy, your Maximum Leader realized that he prefers only “oysters.”

Carry on.