Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader is pleased to resume his part in posting in the weekly forum of topics covered by the Men’s Club and Demystifying Divas. Alas, this week you, dear readers, may have been better served if the good Minister of Propaganda had written on this week’s subject. You see, this week we are dealing with the topic of “How can you tell if someone is single?” Alas, your Maximum Leader is happily married (but not so happy that he wouldn’t entertain offers from… Oh… The dreamy Miss Jennifer Love Hewitt…). Since your Maximum Leader has been married for a while, his ability to spot a single woman has grown dull. But our Minister of Propaganda is single and always looking to make the acquaintance intelligent left-of-center women. So, as you can see, the M of P might be able to shed more light on this subject than your Maximum Leader.
This is not to say that your Maximum Leader has nothing to contribute on this topic. Far from it. You see, now that your Maximum Leader is married and has reproduced from time to time single women just present themselves to him. As he remembers this was also the case when he was unmarried, but in a serious relationship with a woman.
Your Maximum Leader has found that being a father in certain situations is a sure-fire way of attracting single women. By this he means that when he goes out places with one of his brood, without the company of Mrs Villain, he is often approached by single women. Not just any places mind you, but he’s always found that the same type of places suddenly show themselves to be “single women” zones.
For example, your Maximum Leader was out with the Wee Villain (aged 16 months) at the beachover the summer. Your Maximum Leader was just out for a walk in the evening to get a little exercise. He was stopped no fewer than three times by young women who wanted to coo over the Wee Villain. The Wee Villain would play “shy” and “hard to get” which only intensified the cooing of the young women. Your Maximum Leader would ask the cooing women if they had kids. The answer was the same. “No, I’m still looking for the right man.”
This caused your Maximum Leader to think. Why would a woman looking for the right man stop a man who was walking around with a baby? Well, the plainly evident reason is that at some level of that woman’s mind she knew that the man with the baby had already been shown to be the “right man” by someone. And since the man was alone, there was a chance that due to some unknown circumstance the man might be available.
This thought is in line with your Maximum Leader’s experience when dating. Indeed, many men have similar experiences when they are dating. You know the experience of which your Maximum Leader is speaking. The one when a man is single and not seeing anyone there can often be long stretches where no woman is apparently interested in him. But if a man is seeing a woman things are somehow different. If a man has decided to date one woman exclusively it is as though he is now surrounded by a mystical “taken aura” visible only to other women.
And when a single woman sees the “taken aura” she is intrigued. Why is he taken? He must have something going for him? After all, no sensible woman would date a man that didn’t have some redeeming qualities. This is a man who should be investigated further.
Yes loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader can remember a number of times when he was seriously dating a woman and he had to fight off the single women who were interested. (Well… That might be a bit of hyperbole there. But he can remember at least one time - and perhaps two (damn the alcohol!) - when he did have to fight off a woman who was all over him.) It seems as though the only sure way to be certain if a woman was single and interested was to be unavailable.
Yes you read that correctly. The only way for a man to be certain a woman is single (and interested) is for the man to be unavailable to women other than the one with whom he is in a relationship.
That is sorta weird isn’t it? Only by appearing “harmless” is the man able to truly know if a woman is single. Otherwise there is always the game. The game of “exchanging glances, buying drinks, trying to think up witty opening lines, then establishing a baseline of interest, then trying to arrange a less chance encounter.”
So there. You now have your Maximum Leader’s thoughts on this topic.
For other manly thoughts check out Phin, The Wizard, and Stiggy. For the feminine Divas view check out Kathy, Silk, and Phoenix. (And Sexy Sadie too - who refused to conform to convention but gave you a sneak peek into next week’s topic.) Also check out Nugget and Jamesyboy.
Carry on.