The Moral High Ground

At Jackfest this summer, the ML and MOP got into it a bit with the Plame affair. The MOP saw it as a major scandal that could be leveraged into Democratic gains. The ML was already following the “technically, he didn’t break the law mode.”

I came down with the opinion that it just didn’t matter. Without the sexiness of orally fixated interns, the scandal would not hold the average tv news viewer’s attention. I didn’t agree with the ML’s glib assessment, but foresaw that average Republicans’ position of moral rectitude was easily suspended when the accused was one of their own.

It has now been revealed that in addition to Karl Rover, Scoter Libby was also talknig to the press about Ms. Plame. These fellows are professional, capable guys, so I find it hard to believe that they were both randomly off the reservation at the same time. This was definitely a political payback.

I’m not sure of the “techincal” legality of the leaks. It would be hard to call Plame an active “covert operative,” but I guess that is up to the CIA to define. But it seems to me that Clinton’s “It depends on what the meaning of ‘is’ is,” has become the Republican Party’s line of defense.

DeLay’s indictment has renewed the chorus of political hypocrisy. Democrats who defended Clinton’s smarmy techincal defenses are now shocked - shocked I tell you - to discover DeLay’s crimes. (Second concession of the day to the Maximum Leader: we aren’t hearing much from Dems in Congress, perhaps because they are guilty, albeit on a smaller scale, of similiar misdeeds.)

Republicans are now jumping on the “DeLay is being prosecuted by a partisan prosecutor! Indictments mean nothing! It’s a vast left wing conspiracy!” bandwagon. Sound familiar? All those fellows who screamed for moral rectitude are so full of crap that their eyes are brown. A hat tip does go out to our friend Professor Jawa, who has refused to “drink the kool-aid” and is bearing the wrath of conservative bloggers.

One has to wonder…

If the Republicans apply moral principles only to the opposition,
Raise non-defense spending by 29% and pack 6000 pork projects into the budget, spending money like Ted Kennedy in a liquor store,
Won’t keep campaign promises to their core constituency (see my Meiers post below),
Shift power toward the unitary rather than the confederate side of the geographic power spectrum,
Deny individual liberty outside the economic realm,

Why ought Conservatives to support them?

If you are a conservative, please explain in the comments why you support a non-conservative president. Is it simply a matter of choosing the lesser of two evils (with Kerry playing the part of Lucifer)?

For The Minister of Propaganda

In case you feel the need to comfort Kate, here are the driving directions.

Cleanliness is Next to…

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader sees that his Holiness, Benedict XVI keeps his dentist appointments. Even if it means missing a meeting of a general synod of bishops.

Makes one wonder if the Pope doesn’t want to pay that missed appointment fee…

Of course, that dentist must have some balls. Would you really charge a missed appointment fee to the man who holds the keys to the kingdom of heaven? Your Maximum Leader thinks not.

Carry on.

Today Is A Red Letter Day

Mark it on your calendars kids:

The Smallholder hereby bows to the political wisdom of the Maximum Leader.

Many moons ago, the Maximum Leader explained to his Minister of Agriculture that Republicans had no intention of overturnin Roe v. Wade. If Roe v. Wade was overturned, the fervor (read: campaign contributions and voter turnout) of Evangelical Protestants would decline. Liberals, alarmed by news reports of women suffering from the complications of do-it-yourself coathanger abortions, would get energized. So overturning Roe is a lose-lose proposition for the Republicans.

Your Smallholder did not believe it. He actually believed that Republican politicians were sincere about being pro-life.

Today’s nomination of Meiers, coupled with the elevation of Roberts, is solid evidence that the Maximum Leader knows whereof he speaks. I know - if you are shocked at me writing that last sentence, imagine my surpise!

Both Roberts and Meiers belive in stare decisis - deference to past court decisions. Neither strike me as being activist.

Bush hasn’t just backstabbed the pro-lifers who pushed him over the top in hopes of ending abortion. He’s shivved them in the liver.

Worse yet, he’s made me admit the Maximum Leader was right and I was wrong.

Excuse me. I have to go take a shower.

Harriet Who? Part Deux.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader just finished reading the latest from David Frum concerning the Miers nomination. So far, your Maximum Leader finds himself in agreement with Frum on the point he makes in his update. Agreement not just insofar as the Miers nomination is concerned, but also in agreement on many of the personnel issues that are touched upon.

Neutral feelings moving towards cold pricklies…

Carry on.

The Great White North

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader would like to give advanced warning to all loyal readers. He will blog little to none-at-all during the period from October 16 to October 21. He will be away from the Villainschloss and traveling to Toronto, Canada between those dates. It looks like he might have some free time in Toronto during that time and may be able to meet up with any Toronto area readers.

(FYI, he is not going to Toronto to get involved with the Sex Party. In case you were wondering.)

If he is lucky he might catch a Leafs game. (Ick… The only available game would be Toronto v Carolina. He would have hoped for a contest against one of the original NHL franchises… Born under a bad sign…)

If you are interested in trying to meet your Maximum Leader, send him an e-mail. Address listed on left side nav bar.

Carry on.

Harriet Who?

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader found himself in front of the TV this morning repeating to himself “Janice Rodgers Brown… Janice Rodgers Brown…” before the big announcement was made. After the announcement was made he said to himself, “Harriet who?”

Talk about dark horse candidates. Was she on anyone’s short list? Anyone’s long list?

You know, your Maximum Leader wasn’t disturbed by the Roberts nomination in the way so many were. He felt that if John Roberts had been vetted by the Reagan Administration years ago that was a good sign. (Remember, to be appointed to the Reagan Administration two questions had to be answered correctly. 1 - Was the person a conservative? 2 - Did they support Ford in 76? The correct answers were “Yes” and “No.”) So the question in your Maximum Leader’s mind for Roberts was “Has he changed in 20 odd years?” Your Maximum Leader feels as confident as one can be on these things that Roberts hadn’t.

But 30 minutes into the appointment process for Harriet Miers your Maximum Leader isn’t filled with warm tinglies.* This is not to say that your Maximum Leader thinks that only sitting (or former) judges should be appointed to the Supreme Court. He doesn’t believe that. It is to say that he doesn’t see how he is going to “get to know” Harriet Miers. She is not going to be forthcoming in her opinions on anything (as no nominee has been for about 15 years now). And one presumes at this point that she has very little in the way of a written record.

So far, your Maximum Leader is not pleased at all. Stay tuned to see if his opinion changes…

Carry on.
(more…)

The Maximum Leader Wrestles With One of His Ministers . . .

I know your immediate assumption about the Minister in question is ‘Smallholder,’ but no, I intended ‘wrestles with’ to suggest an ongoing discussion, NOT the Greco-Roman intwining of sweaty male bodies which you might have first thought. That’s a different post. If anyone is still interested in this discussion business, ML and your ever humble MoP are going back and forth in the comments section of this post, concerning Mr. Bennett’s recent comments on abortion and race. Join in, if you’re so inclined. Unless your name is ‘Smallholder,’ in which case you’d best just stick with that other wrestlin’.

Believe.

One-Word Movie Reviews V: Review Harder

Despite the temptation to spice up the sequels, no gimmicks this time. How does James Bond manage to keep it fresh and exciting with every single outing? There is also another film in this posting that I worked on, for any minions who are interested.

As before, movies are ranked by personal preference within each category.

In Theaters:
A History of Violence: penetrating
Corpse Bride: amusing
Goal!: competent
Lord of War: simplistic
Flightplan: dreadful

Viewed at home:
Mean Streets: raw
13 Conversations About One Thing: affecting
The Long Goodbye: deliberate
Millennium Actress: innovative
6ixtynin9: derivative

I’m going to be in Utah for the next two months working on a new film, somy postings may be sporadic. Will you miss me? I believe you will — unless you’re lucky enough to be both comely and in the Salt Lake City area, in which case we can meet for drinks . . . to discuss politics, movies, and amusing anecdotes about our Maximum Leader and the other ministers, naturally. My e-mail is on the left.

Believe. (Everything except the bit about James Bond being ‘fresh and exciting’ every time — that’s complete bullshit).

100 Below

Sheriff Rogers scratched his balding head.

This was an odd case.

“And there is n sign of the driver?”

“As I said, officer, all I found was the truck, in our pasture, with our cows in the back. Who knows where the driver went.”

Sheriff Rogers thanked the farmwife for her time. No one had reported a stolen truck. And where had the rustlers gone? He scratched his balding head. He was definitely missing something.

He put the squad car and gear and rolled down the driveway.

The pigs lolled happily in the morning sun.

How’d I Miss This?

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader wonders how he could have missed a recent Tyra Banks show where Miss Banks and Miss Jennifer Love Hewitt argued about who has larger breasts? He missed the show but now reads about it on I Don’t Like You In That Way.

And by reads about it he really means “looks at the photos.”

Thanks Jenny. You made your Maximum Leader’s day.

Carry on.

Need Context?

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader has decided to weigh in on the whole Bill-Bennett-wants-to-abort-black-babies deal.

Here goes…

Your Maximum Leader does know that it’s true that if you wanted to reduce crime, you could, if that were your sole purpose, you could abort every black baby in this country, and your crime rate would go down.

Your Maximum Leader does know that it’s true that if you wanted to reduce the future population of itinerant farm laborers, you could, if that were your sole purpose, you could abort every hispanic baby in this country, and your supply of future itinerant farm laborers would go down.

Your Maximum Leader does know that it’s true that if you wanted to reduce the number of engineering graduate students, you could, if that were your sole purpose, you could abort every chinese baby in this country, and your number of engineering graduate students would go down.

Your Maximum Leader does know that it’s true that if you wanted to reduce the number of decent law-abiding, tax-paying, God-fearing Americans, you could, if that were your sole purpose, you could abort every white baby in this country, and your number decent law-abiding, tax-paying, God-fearing Americans would go down.

But since we strted off talking about crime here is your Maximum Leader’s final word on crime: Your Maximum Leader does know that it’s true that if you wanted to reduce crime, you could, if that were your sole purpose, you could abort every baby in this country, and your crime rate would go down.

There you have it. Never were more true statements ever blogged on this site or any other. If you want further comments go below the fold… Otherwise…

Carry on.
(more…)

What Was That About Slopes Being Slippery?

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader followed a link from Steve and lo and behold what does he see… Some bald Dutch guy getting married to two women. Yes. It seems that polygamous civil unions are okay in the Netherlands.

Your Maximum Leader doesn’t know what to say really. Of course polygamy has been all fine and dandy in Muslim nations (and Utah) for as long as anyone can remember. But we who were of the Western Tradition could always look askance at polygamy and say outwardly that it was wrong. (While inwardly wondering if Mrs. Villain would convert to Islam so your Maximum Leader could make an honest woman of the dreamy Jennifer Love Hewitt.)

As your Maximum Leader has said many times before. If the only criteria for allowing people to marry was “love” then there can be no restrictions on who can get married. (Well presumably we are only discussing Homo Sapiens here - but your Maximum Leader supposes that even that is up for debate.) Today it is the Dutch who realize this. Tomorrow it will be the Belgians. A week from now the Germans. Then Canada. Then Utah (above-board). Then Massachusetts. Then… Well you get the point.

Your Maximum Leader will just grimly set himself to the task of recording the end of civilization as we know it.

Carry on.

UPDATE: Dr. Shackleford shows us the difference between “Good” and “Bad” polygamy.

What Is This I See?

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader was doing his morning perusal of blogs and jumped out of his seat when he got to The Hatemonger’s Quarterly. Whoa! What is this? Has the Crack Young Staff gone all techie on us and changed their blog skin? Are they HTML luddites no more? Next thing you know they will be using blockquotes and special characters…

Is this as monumental as the New York Times putting colour photos in the Grey Lady?

Your Maximum Leader dares to say that it is…

What is next? Comments and Trackbacks? Egad. Your Maximum Leader needs a drink.

Carry on.

Men’s Club topic — “Emotional Men”

I would have thought the Ministers here at Naked Villainy would have wanted to re-start the Men’s/Diva’s topic discussions with a bang and have one of the others start us off, but alas, I have drawn the short straw and have to get the ball rolling for the team.

The first topic for discussion is rolled up in the ball of wax called “Emotional Men”. Specifically, how emotional do women want us to be? - Why don’t we share our feelings? - If we show emotion, are we really being strong men? - Do women really want the strong silent type?-

(NOTE: Its hard for me to lump married and unmarried folks together, and life is sooo much more different when you are getting “the milk for free,” that I am going to drop that and just talk about how all this hoo-ha relates to marriage. For those of you not married and are bored already, now is the time to start surfing for porn.)

Whew.

The simple answer to all of that emotional gobblety-gook is that we, as men, are screwed.

The thing is, if a women deep down really wants an open emotional partner that expresses concerns and affection freely and openly, I am willing to bet that she has probably married someone who doesn’t say a freakin’ word about anything.

This is a conditioned response that probably started with the relationship we had with our mothers. We have learned (actually, we have been taught) that the more we say the more trouble we get in. If we open up, what we might have said gets us in trouble because it probably wasn’t the “right” thing, and if we don’t say anything, we get in trouble for not doing our “share” in the relationship. We men have been in the game long enough to know that the trouble you get in for not sayin’ nothing is less than it would have been had we actually said anything.

Why?

Because a woman’s need to Bitch about something far outweighs her need for open and honest communication. In my own little psychological experimentation lab (also known as marriage), I have tested this theory numerous times. The results are always the same.

More communication and emotional expression on the man’s side = the deeper “in shit” that he will be when the “discussion” is over.

By the way, “discussion” in a marriage is a misnomer. It’s really more of a lecture. Oh sure, from time to time I will get in a “yeah, but…” or a “Honey I…” but most of the time, I don’t.

What’s worse, though, is when the woman “stops” talking and gives you the look that says “ok what do you have to say for yourself?” In her brain she “thinks” she has asked you a question. What she doesn’t realize though, is that she has actually just strung together about 23 statements, and has stopped long enough to think about more ammunition to shoot at you.

But I just sit there and keep quite because I know no mater what I say next, its going to be the wrong thing. If I make a remark that could be interpreted as an agreement, then I am screwed. But if I make a remark that in somehow refutes any of those 23 statements, I am screwed too.

And its not like there is “make up and be friends again” sex at the end of all this. That might have happened in the early days of dating, or while in that first year of marriage but she and I both know that there is NOTHING that I can do or say that is going to put any moisture in the oyster.

As a matter of fact, that is my new stance on sex and discussion in the relationship. When my wife says to me now that “we need to talk about _____ !” I immediately say, “I am too tired to talk about ______.” I don’t care if I just woke up after 19 hours of uninterrupted sleep (which never happens now anyway with 2 kids), I say “I am too tired to discuss it.”

I figure hey, if she can be too tired for sex, I can be too tired to discuss. And if you women don’t think fuckin’ is as important as discussin’, lady you got a lot to learn about men.

The only time you see a married man who is open and honest about his feelings is when its in the script.
Seeing all those emotional men on tv and at the movies must really warp women’s brains brains about how men really are… Kind of like Cosmo warps their brains about what they should look like.

That, of course, is another topic altogether.

For other Men’s Club postings today check out: Phin, Down for Repairs, Project Bowl and Jamesyboy. For the delightfully feminine side of this topic try out: Fist Full of Fortnights, Cake Eater Chronicles, Just Breathe, and Villains Vanquished.

Back to the Trenches

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