Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader has a question for you all.

At what age (approximately) does one stop “growing up” and start “growing old?”

Your Maximum Leader figures 30-35 is likely the time frame. But he isn’t sure.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader has had a few action packed days here recently. He went with the whole family (and his sainted parents) to the Pompeii exhibit at the National Gallery of Art. That was Saturday. It was quite fun for the whole crew. Well… It wasn’t quite as fun for the Wee Villain. He is only 4 however and did spend about 45 minutes in the exhibit before he needed to be excused to sit in the atrium and play his Nintendo to pass time while the rest of the family took in the art and artifacts.

Then on Sunday the celebration of Villainette #2’s tenth birthday began. The extended family got together for a buffet lunch and ice cream cake. Monday was just filled with lots of little time-occupiers. Yesterday was actually Villainette #2’s birthday. She got her special birthday dinner (barbequed chicken, mashed ‘taters, green beans with bacon). This Friday the birthday celebrations come to a close with a sleep-over. Villainette #2 has invited 3 friends to sleep over and play the Wii until all hours of the morning. Your Maximum Leader will likely be up late with the kids - then wake up early to make sure there is a nice big hot breakfast available…

So… Monday night Villainette #1 and your Maximum Leader were driving around town in the Villainmobile while trying to get pick up a last-minute gift for Villainette #2. The ole iPod was plugged in and was dishing out random tunes. A song your Maximum Leader happened to mention in the past was dished out. As the dulcet tones of Air Supply’s “Making Love Out of Nothing At All” started to play this little conversation transpired.

Villainette #1 - So Dad, this guy singing has a high voice.

MaxLdr - Yup. He also had blonde hair that was long and feathered like that old picture of your mom hanging up in your Papa’s house. The one you laugh at when you see it.

V1 - So he had long hair like a girl and a high voice?

MaxLdr - Yup. He did.

V1 - Did he dress like a girl too?

MaxLdr - No. He did wear a lot of linen however. It was the style at the time.

V1 - And people liked it?

MaxLdr - Yes. People loved it.

V1 - I’m glad those days are gone.

MaxLdr - Oh… Those were the Reagan years. Halcyon days they were. Feathered hair. Miami Vice. The Soviet Union menacing the free world.

V1 - Dad you can stop. Things are better now.

MaxLdr - Really?

V1 - Really. We have a Wii. Our hair is normal. And we have cool songs like “Black and White” by Katy Perry.

MaxLdr - Hey! Look there! The hot sign is on at Krispy Kreme. Want a doughnut?

And so it went that your Maximum Leader was able to change the subject before he had to start a harsh critique of the “aughts” and Katy Perry.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader has been missing the occasional agriculture post from his dear friend The Smallholder. Yes… He would like to read about the glories of farming and husbandry in the mountains of Virginia.

While he waits he’ll just have to consume massive quantities of sausage from the hog that Smallholder raised for him. Last night your Maximum Leader made “Sausage O’Patties” with Villainette #1 for dinner. Sausage O’Patties are essentially 1 lb of sausage mixed with 2 medium shredded potatoes. The potatoes and sausage are mixed, formed into patties, and fried in “The Skillet.”

Quite tasty.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader enjoyed the snow he got last week. Indeed, he enjoyed it a lot; but his villainous offspring loved it. Time off school… Playing in snow… Building a snow-fort…

Yes… They (all the Villainous offspring and a few others in the ‘hood) built two snow-forts out behind the Villainschloss…

Well… Not really snow-forts as much as snow-redoubts.

There wasn’t a lot of snow here so they actually went far and wide to gather more snow. They trudged around with a wheelbarrow and a load of shovels to transport snow to build the fort/redoubts. There were two constructed at opposite ends of the yard. Villainette #1 built on the southern side of the yard. Villainette #2 built on the northern side of the yard. Both of the redoubts were rather wide semi-circles. Thick walls at the bottom becoming narrower towards the top. Standard design really. Your Maximum Leader didn’t pay much attention to the construction of either of the redoubts. He did notice when the fighting was done that Villainette #2’s redoubt seemed a bit larger and more robust.

If only he’d known just how robust at the time…

Now that the snow has melted your Maximum Leader has noticed that there is a nice assortment of firewood in the area where Villanette #2 built her redoubt. The firewood is of a generally uniform size and appears to have been pounded into the ground a little before being covered with snow. When your Maximum Leader asked Villainette #2 about the firewood she said that she had used it to “reinforce the wall.” She apparently cleared ground before building the redoubt. She selected pieces of firewood of roughly the same size and shape from the woodpile. Arranged the wood in a semi-circle. Used another piece of wood to pound her “posts” down. Then she covered the whole lot with snow. When asked why she did this her answer was, “I didn’t want [Villainette #1] and her friends to come by and knock down the wall with their feet like I planned to do to their wall.”

That girl has got promise…

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader sees that the wreck of the HMS Victory has been discovered. This is not the famous flagship of Lord Nelson at Trafalgar. (That HMS Victory is still commissioned and sitting at Portsmouth - where by the way it needs your help.) This HMS Victory is the one that sank in 1744. The one commanded by Admiral John Balchin.

The HMS Victory was found about 60 miles west of where she was thought to have sunk according to the Odyssey Marine Exploration company. According to the piece:

Generations of researchers have puzzled over the loss of the Victory, which sank in 1744 carrying a crew of more than 1,000, more than 100 brass cannons, and four tons of gold it was transporting from Portugal.

Most historians have said the wreckage of the ship had to lie close to the Channel Islands, near the French coast, where Adm. John Balchin was believed to have fatally steered it onto rocky shoals.

But the wreckage was found much farther out in the English Channel, said Greg Stemm, chief executive of Odyssey Marine Exploration, the Florida-based firm that announced the discovery at a London news conference.

Stemm, who said finding the Victory “has solved one of the greatest shipwreck mysteries in history,” said the famous ship’s remains had been damaged over the years by natural erosion and by fishing trawlers dragging heavy nets across the sea bottom.

“Rather than staying frozen in time beneath the waves, this unique shipwreck is fading fast,” marine archaeologist Sean Kingsley, director of Wreck Watch International, said in a statement released by Odyssey.

Very interesting news. One hopes that the treasure hunters will get to salvage and keep artifacts that they can save from the wreck.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader wonders what the hell it is with the people President Obama wants to appoint to his team of rivals. Lets see… Treasury headed by a man who failed to pay self-employment taxes that he was advised by his employer to pay. (He also accepted reimbursments of taxes he failed to pay.) Then you get the former Senate Majority Leader and Health and Human Services Secretary designee hasn’t paid taxes on goods and services provided to him. (Who’da thunk Tom Daschle wouldn’t pay the taxes - and somehow not be tainted by an ethics investigation and trial - like Ted Stevens.)

Now you get the “Chief Performance Officer” designee (Nancy Killefer) declaring that she hasn’t paid taxes for domestic help and is withdrawing her nomination.

Great jeezey chreezey. Isn’t failure to pay your taxes a crime? Didn’t they get Capone for that stuff? Your Maximum Leader might (just might) have been okay with giving one appointee a “pass” in the spirit of bipartisanship (and peace and love and all that hooey). But we’re up to three now. Where the hell is the honor that Bill Richardson had by just bowing out early? This is a serious problem that no one (in the mainstream media certainly) seems to be too worked up about. Heaven forfend what we would be hearing if these people were McCain appointees.

Of course, your Maximum Leader is only focusing here on the tax problems of Obama’s people. There is the whole Bill Clinton issue for Hillary. Does anyone think that Bill is going to show restraint when it comes to accepting donations to his foundation? Your Maximum Leader doesn’t.

All these problems seem to be blythely passed over by most people who should be reporting and causing a fuss. Afterall the economy is in the crapper and we can’t be bothered with focusing on this small stuff… Hey! Your Maximum Leader has an idea for you… How about we just make the whole problem better by just giving everyone a year without taxes? That way people who wouldn’t ordinarially pay their taxes (like many in the President’s cabinet-to-be) wouldn’t have to worry about getting caught not paying their taxes. Normal tax-paying citizens would get the benefits that potential cabinet level officials are already getting. Since we are borrowing more money than anyone can actually conceptualize, what is a few gazillion more dollars? What are our creditors going to do if we decide not to pay? Invade? Fart in our general direction?

All in all your Maximum Leader would say that President Obama isn’t off to a very good start.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader found a cool link over on Agent Bedhead’s site. The link takes one to io9.com’s page entitled Elvis Has Left the Planet.

Your Maximum Leader, a great Elvis fan, had never heard of many of the stories and tv episodes that are mentioned on the io9 site. He’ll have to check some out. There was one that your Maximum Leader did see listed that he actually owns on DVD. That would be Bubba-Ho-Tep. io9’s bit on Bubba-Ho-Tep:

Weary of his fame, Elvis decides to take a breather and find someone else to endure his endless public adoration. He exchanges lives with the world’s most convincing Elvis impersonator, but when the facsimile dies on the can, no one believes that Elvis is the genuine King. He lives out his remaining days in relative peace, at least until the mummies and vampires start showing up.

What a great film… Elvis and Jack Kennedy spending their twilight years fighting mummies and vampires…

Check it out if you’ve not seen it.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader isn’t sure what the hell is up with that title. He isn’t up on all that type of talk. What your Maximum Leader is up on however is sexy. Oh yes… Your Maximum Leader knows sexy. Knows it like the back of his gauntlet-clad hand.

You know what is sexy?

The new “age regressed” portraits of Martha Washington.

Yes… That Martha Washington. George’s wife. The “mother” of our Country.

You should clicky the linky and read the piece on the WaPo web site. Be sure to click on the photos and see the age regressed portrait.

Your Maximum Leader will never think of her the same way again… He might also pack up the kiddies and go and see Martha’s purple wedding slippers at Mt Vernon.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader wanted to take a moment and thank our commenter/reader Old School Lady for her recent comment. Your Maximum Leader did spend some time this weekend meditating on the notions of justice and revenge. As satisfying and bashing someone’s head in with a cricket bat might be, it isn’t always a good theory of justice to which to adhere.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader should note for those of you who might be new to the site that he does approve comments from new commenters. He doesn’t read the pending comments bin every day, so if they don’t appear right away it is likley because he hasn’t looked at them.

Of course, your Maxmium Leader reserves the right to delete any comments and ban any IP address for any whimsical reason that might pop into his mind. Blah… Blah… Blah… Blah…

Enjoy yourselves.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader enjoyed the big game last night. He didn’t really have a dog in the fight so he can’t say as he is displeased (or pleased) with the outcome. Mrs Villain was rooting hard to Arizona (liking underdogs as she sometimes does). The Villainettes were rooting hard for Pittsburgh (as some of their best friends are Steelers fans). Your Maximum Leader was busying thinking about Danica Patrick when the game wasn’t on.

Congrats to the Steelers and their fans. Now it is time to start thinking about next year and a fourth ring for the Packers.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader occasionally reads something that saddens and enrages him at the same time. But before he gets to that, allow him to backtrack for a moment.

Your Maximum Leader has, from time to time, expressed in this space that he might be in favor of getting rid of the death penalty if instead we agreed to remove individuals convicted (and appealed) of some particular heinous crimes to be released into society - but without the protection of the state.

This is to say that we are all living in a country that provides a degree of protection to citizens against being murdered. Specifically, the right to kill someone is reserved by the state (in most circumstances). So, if you are murdered, the state can (and ostensibly will) seek to find your killer, deprive them of their liberty and eventually their life. I have said in the past that the state shouldn’t be in the revenge business (ideally speaking). Your Maximum Leader has hypothesized that the state should allow those convicted of particularly heinous and disgusting crimes (murder for example) after their trial and appeals process is finished to be released back into society. But these released people are not subject to the protection of the state. Here is a hypothetical for you. Man murders young girl. Man is convicted. Man’s conviction is upheld on numerous appeals. Final appeals are exhausted. Man is shown to the prison gate and released. Murder victim’s father and brothers await outside the prison gate with baseball bats. Victim’s family beats man to death. Victim’s family walks away not to face any prosecution. Why? Because the man (the murderer) is not entitled to the protection of the state.

So let us move along now shall we?

So, this is the press article that enraged your Maximum Leader. Prosecutor: Slain toddler said “I love you” at end. The opening paragraphs of the piece:

A slain toddler tried to stop her mother and stepfather from beating her to death by reaching out to her mother and saying, “I love you,” a prosecutor told jurors Tuesday. The pleas from 2-year-old Riley Ann Sawyers didn’t stop her mother, Kimberly Trenor, from continuing to brutalize her, assistant district attorney Kayla Allen said in her opening statement at Trenor’s murder trial.

But defense attorney Tommy Stickler Jr. told the jury that Trenor, 20, never intended to kill her daughter in 2007 and that things just “spun out of control.”

Okay now… Your Maximum Leader read that piece and in this order 1) came close to crying; 2) was filled with rage; 3) was filled with rage and regret that the prosecutor decided not to go for the death penalty. All those emotions came upon your Maximum Leader in about 60 seconds.

Now… After some calmer reflection your Maximum Leader would like to know exactly how the prosecutor knows that the slain toddler said these things. (Your Maximum Leader suspects that the mother or stepfather confessed to it.) He certainly hopes that the prosecutor isn’t elaborating on this horrible story for the sake of a dramatic closing statement.

That bit of curiosity aside, your Maximum Leader would want the mother, if convicted and after exhausting appeals, to be released without the protection of the state. In that circumstance, he would consider driving to Texas with a gun, a cricket bat and a bad attitude.

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader was just saying how there were too many things to celebrate going on this past weekend. One of them was Robert Burns Day (which was yesterday). Just like Lunar New Year sneaking up on him, this one snuck up on him too. Sure he got the little reminders that he sets for interesting cultural remembrances like Robert Burns Day. But he disregarded them… So… He didn’t celebrate the great day. Sadly, no one invited him to a Burns Dinner either…

While your Maximum Leader didn’t have a haggis last night, he did have lamb (which if it had been allowed to grow up would have become a sheep suitable for making into haggis). He didn’t read any Burns poetry either.

As sad as it might be that there wasn’t formal celebrating, the day did not pass unnoticed by your Maximum Leader’s loyal readers…

One “Haggis McHaggis” posted a wee little poem for your Maximum Leader’s edification at last year’s Burns Day post. It made your Maximum Leader chuckle so that he feels he must repost it here.

Tae A Fart

Oh what a sleekit horrible beastie
Lurks in yer belly efter the feastie
As ye sit doon amongst yer kin
There sterts tae stir an enormous win’

The neeps an’ tatties an’ mushy peas
Stert workin’ like a gentle breeze
But soon the puddin’ wi’ the sonsie face
Will have ye blawin’ a’ ower the place.

Nae matter whit the hell ye dae
A’body’s gonnae hae tae pay
Even if ye try tae stifle
It’s like a bullet oot o’ a rifle

Haud yer bum tight tae the chair
Tae try an’ stop the leakin’ air
Shift yersel fae cheek tae cheek
Pray tae God it disnae reek.

But aw yer efforts gan asunder
Oot it comes like a clap o’ thunder
Ricochets aroon’ the room
Michty me! A sonic boom

God Almichty, it fairly reeks!
Hope I huvnae s**t ma breeks!
Tae the bog ah’d better scurry,
Ach, whit the hell, it’s no ma worry.

A’body roon aboot me chokin’
Yin or twa were nearly boakin’
I’ll feel better for a while
Cannae help but raise a smile.

Wis him! I shout with accusin’ glower,
Alas! Too late! He’s just keeled ower
Ye dirty bugger, they shout and stare
A didnae feel welcome ony mair

Where e’r ye be let yer wind gan free
Sounds like just the job for me
Whit a fuss at Rabbie’s party
Ower the sake o’ one wee farty.

That there is funny. Your Maximum Leader is curious to learn which of his readers might be “Haggis McHaggis.” If you would like to fess up - your secret is safe with your Maximum Leader…

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader believes that there was too much to celebrate this past weekend. Take for example the beginning of the Year of the Ox. Normally your Maximum Leader tries to do something special to celebrate the Lunar New Year. This year it snuck up on him. He didn’t realize it was coming until it was already upon him.

Your Maximum Leader should have tried harder to find out when the Year of the Ox was beginning… When he mentioned it to his villainous family yesterday Villainette #1 cried out “Yay! It’s my year!” Your Maximum Leader wasn’t sure what she was talking about, he looked at her and said “Quoi?” She said “I’m an Ox. This is my year! How fun!” Then your Maximum Leader realized that Villainette #1 will be 12 years old this year. She will, later in the year, have made it through a whole zodiac cycle. It made your Maximum Leader feel a little old actually…

Happy Lunar New Year!

Carry on.

Greetings, loyal minions. Your Maximum Leader is lazy today. He is awaiting Battlestar Galactica tonight and is not concentrating very hard on anything.

So.. By way of taking content from another place…

The guys at Kissing Suzy Kolber have a nice post on bacon infused alcohol… If you are interested in bacon flavored drinks… Clicky on the linky…

(Your Maximum Leader is posting this and thinking about you Bobgrrl…)

Carry on.